Eyeliner. Cigarette. Argyle sweater. Smile.

I'm boring and fickle. Sometimes absurd, often absent. If you're reading this, you probably have some idea what it is that I do on the Internet. If not, you probably don't want to be here. Looking for high-maintenance friendship? Better not add me.

Plagiarism and now this? I am on a roll!

But really, I've already had a long PM conversation with this person on FFN. Was this honestly necessary? What, I can call Roman Polanski a great director and a disgusting child-rapist, but expressing an opinion about fictional vidya characters, now that's CROSSING THE LINE? WHY DID NO ONE INFORM ME OF THIS?

Maybe I should make the next chapter basically one long author's note about how much I despise most of the main characters in these games. Watch out for it, it will be epic.

Post left public should the person - or anyone else for that matter - want to take it up with me here as well (I don't want to break my longstanding principle and join the comm just to be all butthurt in public). What I don't understand is how my dislike of one characterization somehow means that I think my own characterization is the shiz-nit. You guys know how much I hate my own characterization, I only bitch about it every other update.

This fandom isn't fun anymore right now. I'm going back to writing my dumb ass Chrome fic. *flounce*

ETA: ETA 2: Previous rant deleted because milk tea, your support and Marsha Linehan's DBT techniques have helped me reach the zen stage where I no longer care if people think I'm stupid or a worthless human being. Instead, I will dig through my old posts and regale you with other acerbic diatribes I've launched against various characters of KH. You know, so people could have more material to rant about. No really, you haven't seen the true depth of my heathen ways yet.

( Respect for canon? Baby, it is to laugh. )

This was supposed to be posted yesterday as a Halloween gift, but I got, uh, sidetracked by the festivity. What happens in Brooklyn stays in Brooklyn, but let's just say that, you know that Lady GaGa song, Just Dance? My night, in a nutshell. Speaking of which, after months of resistance, I have finally succumbed to GaGa Fever (recent events may have attributed to this). I know, I know, you all envy my ability to be so hip and up with the times.

Yada, yada, you all know this routine. I'm pretty sure no one cares at this point, but WHATEVS I DO WHAT I WANT, DA DA DOO-DOO JUST DANCE.

Title: My Girlfriend, Who Lives In Canada (10/?)
Fandom: Kingdom Hearts
Rating: T
Pairings: Axel/Roxas + others
Disclaimer: The Kingdom Hearts franchise and its characters do not belong to me.
Summary: It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single high school boy in possession of a good libido, must be in want of a girlfriend—or a pretend one.

( We are proof that the heart is a risky fuel to burn. )

For once, TBC might actually mean something, because I already have a good chunk of the next "chapter" complete. Oh, and if you find that the flow of this chapter is somewhat less smooth than usual, be assured that it has nothing to do with Roxas's state of mind, and everything to do with Jägermeister frying my brain.

This post is ostensibly so that you can download this kickass soundtrack music.



Karen O and The Kids - All Is Love
Karen O and The Kids - Hideaway
Karen O and The Kids - Rumpus

Now that that's out of the way, a review:

( Where The Wild Things Are: Why You Might Like It, and Why I Would Understand If You Don't )

*put on paper crown and dance around*

My new thing this fall season is villains. Not Draco in Leather Pants, not whiny James Dean-esque bad boys with eye-liner, and not even glorified anti-heroes who likely pull an about face halfway into a series and join up with the good guys. Villains. Maybe it's just because I'm usually into heroes or at least their ambiguously neutral allies, but I find it much more difficult to find a compelling antagonists than the other way around. Many of fandom's oft-loved villians, I find to be incredibly lame, not so much characters as a combination of cliches and plot mechanisms. It's too obvious. Don't you hate it when it feels like the writers are trying to manipulate you into sympathizing with someone?

Another thing I've noticed is that people tend to be attracted to the villains who have their own schemes up their sleeves and secretly defy the evil system, a rabid dog carefully hiding its madness while waiting for its day. The archetype that I see myself being drawn to, on the other hand, is the anguished dogmatist, the guy who follows through with the original plan (which is, for obvious reasons, often heinous and morally unjustifiable) regardless of how much he may roil with doubts and inner conflicts. Dogmatists aren't your garden variety antagonists; they don't do evil because they enjoy causing mayhem and hurting the innocence, but because they, in their heart of heart, truly believe that what they are doing is right, and go to war not with people, but with the ideas and emotions that threaten to dismantle their belief system (no matter how much they resonate with them). Bonus point if the writer manages to somehow make us see their side of the argument to some degree. Bonus bonus point, I also get attached to villains who do evil out of personal loyalty or some fucked up code of honor.

I do not, on the other hand, like it if they're psychopaths or purely dumb muscles -- too convenient, and ineffective besides. Truly formidable foes often are neither.

This kind of character usually isn't the mastermind and doesn't get as much screen time as the flashy double-crosser above mentioned (with noted exceptions: one of my all-time favorite dogmatists is not only the main boss, but is portrayed almost as a second protagonist). What development they get tends to be comparatively subtle and indeed, people may even find them boring and unlikable -- after all, stubbornness isn't a popular trait even with heroes. Anguished dogmatists suffer great personal sacrifices for their cause that many tend to write off because a) they didn't "learn from their losses" and change their ways, and b) they might not even seem all that affected by it (subtlety!). Since they stick with the dark side, my favorite dogmatists almost to a one have come to terrible ends; even the ones that pull a face heel turn and fight for the good side only do it when it's clearly too late to matter (that is, too late for the general audience to start warming up to them, as they tend to croak soon after). To me, that element represents a tragic truth, that for some people, the simple fact of being able to think for themselves and question the system they live under just isn't enough to break them from it. They are as much victims of the system as the people they fight against, the loyal hounds who come to be butchered when the game supply runs out.

Apologies for tl;dr but hey, if you made it this far... tell me, what villains, if any, have you come to sympathize with in your time in fandom? What archetypes do they represent, and how much character development does each get in his/her respective canon?

I'm aware that a total of six people still follow this story, and most of them are on FFN, but. There it be. (Oh God the end is in sight.)

Title: My Girlfriend, Who Lives In Canada (9/?)
Fandom: Kingdom Hearts
Rating: T
Pairings: Axel/Roxas + others
Disclaimer: The Kingdom Hearts franchise and its characters do not belong to me.
Summary: It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single high school boy in possession of a good libido, must be in want of a girlfriend—or a pretend one.

( Thunder only happens when it's raining. )

[1] Always - Suzaku/Lelouch - Code Geass AMV

A trick to making anime music videos is to never use a song you like. There's nothing like spending ten hours in editing to make you loathe the very sound of something. No, that isn't my excuse for always using music I'd be embarrassed to be caught having on my iPod. In other news, is anyone else digging YouTube's new wide-screen layout as much as I am?

[2] Now for some actually respectable music:

M.I.A. - O... Saya
A R Rahman - Ringa Ringa

Both taken off the soundtrack of Slumdog Millionaire, which is shaping up to be my In Bruges of 2009. If my opinion counts for anything, it should and must win Best Picture. I like the other films nominated in this category too - except for Frost/Nixon which I haven't seen and won't see on principle, the principle being that I'm bitter they relegated WALL-E to the ghetto that is Best Animated Feature - but seriously. This movie. Also, the music.

[3] A rec: Cycle (KHR - Mukuro/Tsuna) by octavius_x. Whatever your feelings on the series or the pairing, do what I did: shove them, and prepare to make this face *_* (Hey, bb, you ready to be committed with me over the next challenge? Ahahaha, why do we do this?)

[4] This is what I call getting back on that horse. Baby steps, baby steps :|

Title: Plus One
Fandom: Katekyo Hitman Reborn
Pairing: Yamamoto Takeshi/Gokudera Hayato
Rating: PG-13
Summary: Behind the wheel and wide awake.
Notes: OSS fic for myrafur. Essentially all my commitment-phobic tendencies disguised as fanfiction.

( Hey, this is the future, and we don't grow up like that. )

Kouga Yun I love you but this situation of NEVER UPDATING and UPDATING BUT ONLY WITH SEVEN PAGES OF FILLER needs to stop, or I swear to God I will drop you and your series in a high school dumpster like an unwanted prom baby. I do like these little asides about the characters' daily lives, but they should be just that -- LITTLE ASIDES. WHERE IS THE MAIN MEAT? Why you have to hurt me like this, I only let down my pedo guard for you.

This week in unpopular fandom opinions, I still like Hetalia, and I still feel like Xion's existence somehow pissed in my cheerio. The negative emotions are getting somewhat taxing, especially since I'm so easily swayed by the fandom environment in which I find myself. I wish I could stop, but what can you do? Well, besides becoming a hermit who drinks tea and watches 30 Rock in bed.

Lastly, I know this announcement might be a little superfluous since our flists do somewhat overlap, but I got Dual to write me AkuRoku for oh_shit_santa. IT IS SPECTACULAR, which should surprise no one unless you've been living under a rock, or in another fandom. And who wants to be that person? I am especially gleeful since she wrote AkuRoku and I haven't yet committed to Zemyx, SO I WIN THIS ROUND. TH-THIS IS MY FIC! IT WAS MADE FOR ME! Idk, it's very early in the morning and I ate something called a black angus burger last night.

And yes, I don't have to tell you to go cruise through OSS, no booze therein but plenty of porn and prose and pretty art. (If you do please ignore the post with the boob tag.)